Thanks for pouring your heart out. I tried to address as many of your questions as possible. I hope it made a little sense and offered a modicum of hope. Like, Interculturalisticman alluded, the topic of God is a HUGE subject to address.
The main thing to keep in mind is that we’re always going to see people who say one thing and do another. It’s inescapable. Now this isn’t an ironclad rule or anything, but the best indicators of where people might stand are their actions. Talk is cheap. If people are saying one thing and consistently doing the opposite, then chances are they’ve either been led astray or they’re intentionally going against what they know is right. In those instances, it’s a pretty safe bet that those folks might not be embracing the most basic tenets of Christ’s teachings. So, you leave them be and move on.
Please know that when I wrote, “don’t mind the gap,” that was in the context of deterring one from pursuing a one-on-one relationship with God. No one else can do that for you but you. I didn’t intend to infer that one should overlook bad behavior. We have a responsibility as citizens to call out bad behavior … but that’s a-whole-nother post altogether.
Try not to get caught up in the distraction of whatever the current nastiness is. All that does is wear you down. In times like these the best thing to do is to seek God’s face and see what he has to say about all of this.
Love you, my dear.